not enough
At TFP. It’s my second-to-last day.
It still doesn’t quite feel real that I’ll be leaving this place. I don’t know why.
I think my boss is still convinced he can get me to stay, even though he’s never offered me anything concrete.
I’m leaving here for specific reasons. Since “not being annoyed enough” isn’t one of them, repeatedly saying some variation of “don’t go” isn’t going to make me stay. It doesn’t work like that.
My boss is in his late thirties, but apparently, he hasn’t realized that to keep an employee you want to keep, you have to offer them real change. Saying “I might be able to get some extra money for you” isn’t the same as “We’ll increase you’re salary by X amount.”
While money isn’t the only reason I’m leaving (far from it), it would have been a start to get me to stay.
I hoping my new job will be more stable, less demanding on me as I try to balance my desire to do perfect work with my desire to not spiral down any further, health wise. TFP has never been a good place for me in that respect. I’ve worked weeks without getting a day off, insane hours, multiple jobs. For someone with a condition aggravated by stress (well, both possibilities are, anyway), that’s a recipe for disaster, especially since my symptoms are not controlled.
While TFP has helped me gain experience in certain areas, I don’t want my whole life to be about work. I’d like to see my husband for more than an hour a day. I’d like to hang out with friends, read a book, go to a museum.
I am not willing to make work my only priority. And that’s what I’d have to do to continue working here.
It’s not going to happen.
